I don’t think that I’m alone with cringing every time a “Mormon Fundamentalist” gets on the TV. The member’s collective eye rolling could generate enough force to throw the earth out of its orbit if we coordinated a set time and direction to roll when another one of these crazies gets on MSNBC claming to represent the truth Mormon faith. I do however think I have figured out why this practice, fake LDS polygamy that is, has stayed in existence.
Here’s the deal, have you ever seen an attractive polygamist wife? Sure you have those fake HBO wives, but the real deal, hard core polygamist women are as ugly as the day is long. My guess is the hot ones figure out young and early what a rare commodity they have and beat a fast retreat from the ugly farm to a place where they can get a fair shake at life.
The old men in charge don’t care though because they aren’t in it for the hot ones, fundamentalist polygamy is created for guys and by guys who are into ugly women. Think about it, how about giving these women some make up? Yeah right. Modern hair styles? Nope. Attractive clothing? Heck no. A workout program designed to keep the ladies in shape? You take that kind of talk right out of the faith Mr.
In reality maybe the guys running that apostate group are geniuses, they have convinced the type of women they are into that their personal sexual fetish is some kind of religion. I can hear the conversation going on now “Baby, God told me that big puffy hair is the only style he approves of so that’s the way yours has to stay. He also told me you have to put on a paper sack for clothing, just an FYI.” Sure your wife can fight with you, but who is she to talk back to God on his preferences on style?
In reality I think the “fundamentalists” are a great illustration of extremism in the direction to the right. They are clearly apostate from the faith because they think they know better then the Brethren. They are on the opposite spectrum but essentially the same as all the lefty bloggers who just cant stop finding fault and who if they haven’t already done it (my guess is most have anyways) drive themselves out of the church thinking the whole time how right they are. I digress however, this wasn’t the main point of this post, I promise.